Here’s a submission without a story from an anonymous firefighter:

“I am a firefighter for a major fire department here in California, and on a daily basis I have to shake my head and bite my tounge.  And if we could take pictures of some of these mouth breathers I would have a book . While we’re responding to emergencies, pull to the right and stop people–it’s not that hard. People have no clue or do not care.

We have had people race us, stop, and freeze up. Pass us while we are responding (lights and siren blasting) turn in front of us and act like they don’t see us 20 feet off their bumper. And the only time they will pull over and stop is  if they see a police officer.  We have had people drive behind us across the driveway across the grass as we back into the station–all to get to a red light. More times  than I can count. We had one ASSHOLE go into oncoming traffic with a cop right next to him. Yes, he got a ticket.

We had one lady ( I use that term loosely ) follow us to a rescue and scream and threaten us. Did I mention she refused to pull over for over a mile? And when we finally got around her at a red light, she then followed us to the rescue. A local police officer arrived on scene and wrote her a huge ticket (one for the good guys) . We have had people flip us off and yell because we’re blocking a lane at the scene of a traffic collision. How about driving and parking on the driveway of the station to ask for directions as we’re pulling out to go on a response and saying it will only take a second?

And some of the excuses: 1) I didn’t see you.  2) Thats not how we do it in my country (pick a 3rd world country). 3) I was in a hurry. 4) You’re not a cop. 5) Could not hear you over radio/phone/kids.

I wish we had a cop follow us on every run so they could make a fortune and maybe revoke a few driver’s licenses.”

I found all these stories fascinating to read, and not in a good way. I have personally seen drivers completely ignore the sirens and lights of oncoming emergency first vehicles, but the kind of arrogant, egocentric, clueless aggression detailed above was certainly news to me. First responders always have the right-of-way. And yes, even if they’re coming from the opposite direction, you still must pull over to the side of the road until the vehicles passes. And if pulling over to the side isn’t a feasible option, at least come to a friggen stop.

“This guy parks like an asshole. Taking up three spots at Taco Bell on Bundy and Pico.”

Seriously, if that’s not lazy and inconsiderate, I don’t know what is. At least this guy was parked when the submitter encountered his car. One could only imagine how such a person would drive on the roads.

Here’s an SMS message submission we received: “My worst case scenario was a woman getting on the 805 freeway while breastfeeding, using her cell phone, smoking, and putting on her makeup.  She was driving a humongous SUV also. Thank goodness I was not getting on the freeway.”

I don’t know how this lady had enough hands to pull all that off, but there you have it. I’ve seen plenty of nutty stuff firsthand, so I can’t immediately discount this story as fake. However, breastfeeding while driving and smoking violates at least two laws right off the bat. It takes a very special person to put their child in such imminent and long-term danger at the same time.

Lastly, here’s a story of a commuter who frequents the canyons as I do:

“I live in Topanga Canyon, and the only way we get into or out of our community is to drive six miles on a two-lane winding road through the canyon. There aren’t very many places where you can overtake and pass another car safely, and during busy commute times, there’s often a solid stream of cars going through the canyon; so typically, the vehicle in front of you can’t go any faster than it is. Nevertheless, we still get some total jerks tailgating people – I’ve been behind some folks who are less than a car-length from the bumper ahead of them while going 40 mph. Often, you’ll see someone just pull over on a wide dirt shoulder just to shake the jerk behind them.

One morning at 5:30 am – I kid you not – on my way to a swim lesson, it was just me and two other cars going south to PCH. The guy in front of me hugged the bumper of the woman in front of him the entire six miles to the coast – this can be really scary on the “S” curves. At PCH where the road splits into two lanes, he pulled alongside her and rolled down his window and yelled out “Go back to FRANCE!” I have no idea what he meant! When the light changed, he roared around the corner and I made eye contact with her and just shook my head.”

So, hmm, this aggressive assnut encounters someone on the road who isn’t taking turns like an Indy race car driver, and he immediately assumes that person is from France? I wonder if he started calling french fries “freedom fries” when the French refused to support the U.S. invasion of Iraq in 2003. Regardless, tailgating on single-laned, winding canyon roads is a huge pet peeve of mine, especially during rush hour. Where do these people really expect traffic to go? Do these drivers actually expect one car after another to pull over to the side of the road to allow them to pass so that they can zip through hairpin turns as quickly as possible? I’ve given up trying to relate to the mind of a road raging prick…rather, I just blog about them.

“Push him! Push him! I wish I got this just a few seconds earlier, but you get the point here. We have a female large SUV driver with personalized plates bullying an elderly couple in the Toyota in front. This was taken on Sierra Hwy coming from Golden Valley. A few seconds prior to me getting the shot, you could hear her impatience as she was on the brake, then on the gas. Her modified exhaust was audible whenever she accelerated. She got about 5′ of the elderly couples’ asses before they signaled to make the turn here. She then backed off slightly, but as soon as they turned, she roared past me doing about 60, only to get stuck at the next light behind a bus….”

I was actually surprised to hear that she backed off the Toyota when she saw that they were driving in the #1 lane because they were planning to make a left off the main road. More often than not, drivers in L.A. tailgate you even harder whenever you or they are approaching an exit off the freeway or a turnoff from the road you’re on. It’s almost as if these impatient drivers are trying to will the universe to execute these exits and turns just a fraction of a moment faster. If these second-pinchers are so obsessed with time efficiency, I suggest that they make it up by opting not to wipe their asses after they take a sh*t. That way they’ll both act and smell like assholes.