L.A. Can't Drive » clueless

Clueless Aggressive Moron in Mercedes SUV

I-95, U-405 — Sat, 04 Sep 2010 05:04:57 +0000

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Given the plethora and variety of awful drivers in this town, the driver of this Mercedes ML350 SUV (license plate 6FOZ) could have been either a clueless, inattentive moron or an apathetic, aggressive jackass. I was traveling south on Beverly Glen from the Valley and was approaching Sunset. At this juncture, if you want to continue south on Beverly Glen, you have to do a brief detour onto Sunset by making a right turn, traveling a few hundred feet, and then entering the left turn only lane (at an intersection monitored by a traffic signal) that takes you back onto Beverly Glen. I was in this left turn only lane behind a row of cars waiting to make a left turn. When the light turned green and traffic proceeded to move forward, I suddenly heard honking to my right. I turned and saw the driver of this SUV in the westbound through lane on Sunset suddenly brake for no apparent reason and–without signaling–veer to the left and attempt to squeeze into a line of left-turning vehicles into the single southbound lane on Beverly Glen. Either this person lost track of where he or she was going or, even worse, didn’t want to wait behind a row of cars in the left turn only lane. Regardless, the driver nearly got rear-ended and was now threatening a sideswipe collision with another driver. I braked to allow this clueless sphincter in to avoid a collision. I then saw this SUV driver proceed to tailgate the car that was in front of him/her the entire way down Beverly Glen. I last saw the SUV make a left onto Wilshire (again, without signaling). Drivers like this offend me on so many levels, I can’t even begin to describe it. And it’s not so much the driving as much as it’s the mentality behind such driving. You have to deal with fu*kheads like this at the grocery store, online at the bank, at the deli (oh, I’m sorry, I mean diner…there are no delis in L.A. Canter’s is no Katz’s). Unfortunately, this town is stereotypically known for having a populace with our heads stuck up our asses, and none of us are naive enough to believe that’s going to change anytime soon.

Hydrant Obstructing, Bumper Tapping Sentra

I-95, U-405 — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 19:12:43 +0000

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So here’s an interesting twist to our favorite hydrant at Eleanor Circle and Jakes Way in Santa Clarita. Get a load of this submission:

“I come home from work at 5am and find this piece of sh*t Sentra parked against a neighbor’s Mustang. To make it worse, this same car last week was parked in front of a garage across from ours making it very difficult for us to get our cars out of our garage. We called the manager which then told us to call the security people which then did nothing, so this person continued to park there. Well I guess someone told them they can’t do that so they instead decide to park in front of the infamous hydrant and use the Mustang as a stop. The fenders are literally touching.”

Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t Santa Clarita pretty spacious? Would it kill people to park a tad farther away and take a minute longer to walk home? Or do we just pride ourselves as being a town full of yogis and health nuts because it sounds good, though we don’t practice what we preach? I find it ironic how so many people disrespect the vehicles of other drivers in a car culture town. Bad Karma points for this douche bag.

Dangerous Towing on the Freeway

I-95, U-405 — Sun, 29 Aug 2010 00:34:09 +0000

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It’s been awhile since we’ve talked about towing and cargo storage issues on this site. I got this submission a few days ago that highlights another common problem with L.A. drivers:

“On the 210 Fwy eastbound near Sylmar, I came upon this purple Caravan with a Toyota truck awfully close behind. When I got closer, I saw that the Toyota was in tow as it was weaving from side to side. So me, being the curious guy I am, looked at how the truck was being towed…A CHAIN!! Yes, you can see it hanging in the picture! This Dodge is towing a car on the freeway at freeway speeds with nothing else but a single chain wrapped around the bumper!!! This ranks as one of the stupidest and dangerous things I’ve EVER seen!!!”

Not too bright, guys. I certainly wouldn’t use their services given the way they handled this particular situation. I wonder if they were constantly getting rear-ended by the Toyota whenever they slowed down.

Blatant Red Light Runner from a Dead Stop

I-95, U-405 — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 03:46:00 +0000

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It’s been awhile since I’ve seen a red light runner this egregious, but after driving alongside this guy in his late 50′s in an older model Ford Explorer for several miles while going south on Sepulveda from the Valley, I figured he was more idiot than asshole. Allow me to elaborate: We were stopped at a red light on Sepulveda, much like what’s shown in this photo. This native (license plate 3UZ, red and beige Explorer with faded flames…yes, flames…painted on the side) was first at the light. We were stopped for several seconds when all of a sudden this mustached douche bag decided to run the red light. He didn’t gun it, he just started to accelerate as if the light changed to green. But alas, it was still red, and you can see the heads of all the other drivers stopped at the light turn and follow this guy, wondering what he was doing. He slowed for a fraction of a second as his rear bumper passed through the center of the intersection, at which point I’m guessing he realized that he just “crept” through a red light but decided to keep going since he’d already gone too far. I haven’t talked about creeping in awhile, but it’s a common habit of a lot of drivers here (in NYC, I really only saw cabbies doing it). Creeping is when you see a car start rolling into the intersection when the light is still red, as if the driver is anticipating when the light will turn green. Creeping makes absolutely no sense to me, since it’s not like you’re giving your car a head start. Is it some strange pet peeve of L.A. drivers that they MUST have their car in motion when the light turns green? I’ve seen creepers go pretty far into an intersection before the light actually changes, but I’ve only seen a handful of creepers actually full-blown run a red light like this tool. A cop would’ve had a field day with this one.

San Francisco vs. Los Angeles – Redux

I-95, U-405 — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 04:33:50 +0000

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So we’re back from San Francisco, and it has been almost 2 years exactly since I last did a comparison between SF and LA. We flew up there this time around and didn’t rent a car, so I was seeing everything from a pedestrian’s point-of-view. Perhaps I was a bit kind in my August 30, 2007, assessment of the driving ability in this town, or perhaps I just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, but I actually witnessed one really bad collision (involving a sedan, a minivan taxi, and lots of airbags) and two very near misses that could’ve gone quite badly. The taxi drivers are as bad as the drivers in NY, though they are actually more dangerous since they can go much faster in less traffic congestion. They also signal way less than the taxi drivers in NY. In fact, the frequency of signaling for everyone I saw driving in SF went down on the whole from 2 years ago. Furthermore, there were more instances of leapfrogging at traffic signal regulated intersections. I don’t recall seeing any instances of leapfrogging from drivers other than taxi drivers 2 years ago. This has apparently changed. I’ve also noticed more drivers rolling through stop signs. In fact, one of the near misses involved one guy blowing through a stop sign and nearly getting T-boned by a service van. Now how about the positives? People were definitely doing more driving and less anything else while behind the wheel. If you told me that you saw something trying to fry an omelet in the passenger seat in LA, I wouldn’t be phased. In that respect, SF drivers are more like NYC drivers with a focused aggression behind the wheel. For the most part, the drivers up north are still very attentive to cyclists and pedestrians. Additionally, I only saw 2 drivers driving around at night without headlights on (one on each night I was there), and as we know that percentage is considerably better than anything you will see in LA. So there you have it…taxi drivers are insane, more aggression, less signaling, and on the other side you have more awareness of cyclists and pedestrians, proper usage of vehicle lamps, and less distractions while driving. Oh, I also saw less drivers holding cell phones are texting while driving, so that’s a big plus in my book.

I didn’t get any photos (I couldn’t whip out my phone fast enough), so I dug through the archives and found one of this BMW 328i on La Brea in Los Angeles. This impatient jackass was driving behind me in medium traffic and somehow felt the need to pull up beside me at Wilshire Blvd. at a red light. When the light turned green, naturally he gunned it and cut in front (no signaling) while missing parked cars in the curb lane by several feet. This type of mini-drag racing really boggles my mind since there is such a clear disparity between risk and reward. Then I suppose if you incorrectly treat driving like a game, concepts of safety and responsible driving become moot.

On a side note, I’ve done some freelance writing for Brand X, a publication affiliated with the L.A. Times. You can read my articles on the Bus Riders Union, digital road rage, and the new ignition interlock law here.

Racism and Road Blindness in L.A.

I-95, U-405 — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 05:38:58 +0000

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Before I go into today’s post, I wanted to share a story with you all. My wife and I were taking an evening walk with our son around Toluca Lake this evening and were walking on the sidewalk. We always slow down and make sure that it’s safe to cross in front of any blind driveways or alleys. Why is that? Well, aside for it being the smart thing to do, there is a plethora of horrible drivers in this town who don’t pay attention to anything that weighs less than 500 pounds. With a show of hands, how many of you have nearly gotten run over while crossing the street in a clearly marked pedestrian crosswalk by some oblivious or selfishly aggressive Angeleno driver? Anyway, as we approached this one particular alley, this hunched over, toolish looking dude with glasses (early 40′s) and his blonde wife/girlfriend in a white pickup comes zooming out into the sidewalk, stopping short of the main street. Hey buddy, people actually walk on sidewalks–what a concept! So you might want to pay attention to pedestrians as well rather than merely concerning yourself with T-boning another vehicle. Needless to say, he saw us after he stopped and realized that he did something pretty stupid and failed to yield to pedestrians. Nevertheless, instead of being the bigger person and apologize, he glances in our direction, sees that I’m Asian, and then mutters loudly, “Arigato.” I’m like, are you fuckin’ kidding me? Never mind the fact that my wife isn’t even Asian. If there’s anything I give California credit for it’s that it’s more multicultural than most other states in the nation. Even while growing up in NY, I hardly ever saw anyone who was more than a 2nd generation Asian American (which I happen to be). Forget about the fact that I’m ethnically Chinese and not Japanese….this ignorant, racist, unapologetic fu*kwad actually thought that he gave the appropriate response for cutting in front of a young family walking on the sidewalk. I’ve had to deal with differing levels of racism my entire life, but this is the first time someone pulled this sh*t in front of my son (who happened to be sleeping in his stroller). So I’m sharing this story with you all and will let Karma do the rest.

Now, about the above photo….we were heading to a party Saturday night in the Palisades and were traveling on the 101 West at around 8PM. We arrived at our location at around 8:45, and I can’t even begin to tell you the number of cars we saw on the road without any headlights on (not even driving lights). In this photo alone you can see 3–count ‘em, 3–cars driving around without any low beam headlights on. Hell, car 1 is even tailgating car 2 while going around 70 MPH. I just don’t get how people in this town can be so bloody stupid to drive on the freeway at night without their head/taillights on. And I don’t want to hear any crap about the sun setting and people forgetting to turn their lights on while they’re already driving. Boohoo, some part of the law you actually have to pay attention to while you’re driving when the sky starts to get dark–how sad for you! Get your heads out of your asses and turn on your friggen headlights when it gets late….not a difficult concept, Los Angeles.

Pathetic Valley Punk in Corolla

I-95, U-405 — Sat, 14 Aug 2010 03:51:41 +0000

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Aiite there, punk…you go on with yo’ bad self in yo’ Toyota Corolla. Apparently, he likes the feel of the wind bristling his armpit hair, since he opted to dangle his arm out the window instead of signaling while his car was moving. I was driving along Magnolia in Sherman Oaks when I noticed this tailgating, weaving, non-signaling toolish-looking punk posing behind his wheel. On several occasions, I noticed that he took greater to posture himself more whenever he was stopped at a red light next to a female in another car. Mind you, it didn’t even matter what the woman looked like (or how old she was), either….talk about sexually frustrated and desperate. What really got to me was his erratic, aggressive driving. The streets weren’t busy, so there especially wasn’t any need for him to drive like such a prick, making attempts to abruptly cut in front of drivers at every possible opportunity. Furthermore, the lights are timed in such a way that he never really made much headway (I was watching him drive this way for about a mile before deciding to snap this photo). In the end, I don’t know if this guy is more assholish or just plain pathetic–maybe both.