L.A. Can't Drive

Idiocy Meter
    
Asshole Meter
    
Last Sunday, we decided to take advantage of the beautiful weather and head up to the Santa Barbara Zoo. Traffic was light and moving along nicely. We were traveling in the #1 lane of the 101 Fwy N, and all the cars in this lane were moving along at a nice clip (75 to 80 MPH). And before any knee-jerk, defend-L.A.-at-all-cost naysayers start saying that slower traffic needs to move to the right, I should add that we were easily in the fastest moving lane on the freeway, and cars were more or less safely spaced out. Then enter stage right the jackhole in the shizzy Toyota Corolla. This tailgating punk in his late 20s with dark spiky hair was riding our ass pretty hard before he swerved to his right, glared at us as he sped past, and cut back in front (without signaling, naturally). Oh, did I mention that we were going 75 to 80 along with the other cars in this lane? Needless to say, this impatient fu*kwad then starts bumper humping the car that was previously in front of us. If you think the SUV in the #2 lane is riding close to the Penske truck, I should add that this gelled up moron in the Corolla was tailgating even harder at 5-10 MPH faster than the SUV. Seriously, what did this idiot want to accomplish? Did he really think he deserved to speed as fast as he wanted in the #1 lane, parting the entire litany of cars in front of him in the process? The silly thing about all this is that he actually exited the freeway only a couple miles later, solidifying his oblivious asshole status. Oh, I should also add that he was sucking the tailpipe of the car that was exiting in front of him on the off-ramp.

Filed under: aggressive, car lights, clueless, speeding, tailgating