L.A. Can't Drive

Idiocy Meter

Asshole Meter

I have two submissions for you today–the first goes with this photo:

“This morning (10/16/09)  I was in the left turn lane on Fairfax at the intersection of San Vicente Blvd. A big truck, the Bluebird truck you see in the picture, was in front of me.  A couple of cars were ahead of the truck.  This intersection is always bad.  Traffic eastward on San Vicente sits in the intersection when the light turns red.  The light at Olympic is not synchronized properly.

Anyway, by the time the big truck got into the intersection, the arrow was red so I stayed behind.  Apparently that was just too much for the driver of the big SUV behind me.  He accelerated around me on the left in the oncoming lane and made the turn against traffic. As you can see, he beat out the big truck.  A good thing I waited, ’cause I think he would have hit me in his haste to turn.

I want a huge SUV so I can just ignore all the traffic rules, too.”

I used to live right around this area and know this poorly designed intersection all too well.  You know things are bad in this town when you start seeing aggressive, selfish jackasses run red lights and drive against traffic just to get where they’re going.  With that said, here’s the other anecdote, also involving a an asshole in an SUV.

“Unfortunately, I don’t have a photo because I didn’t have my camera-phone on me on a seemingly short pleasant trip to Bed Bath & Beyond on Ventura Blvd. in Studio City.  I pulled out of the parking lot driveway and made a right onto the right lane of a completely car-free Ventura Blvd. and was going about 40 mph when I started approaching a slow-moving truck in the left lane next to me.  As I drove, I noticed a black Lexus SUV in my rear-view creeping close and closer, until he was pretty much glued to my bumper.  I was kind of annoyed, but just kept my initial speed (not purposely trying to piss him off or anything; if I wanted to do that, I would have stepped on the brakes), and as we passed the truck the Lexus changed lanes to my left, floored it, and as he passed me, we looked at each other with the same “what the hell are you doing, douchebag” expression on our faces and he honked at me!  In his distraction, while he turned to look at me and honk, he nearly hit my car.  I slowed down as half of his car started to drift into my lane.  He adjusted himself back into the left lane, but still wanted to let me know that he owned Ventura Blvd., so he went back into the right lane, in front of me, as we approached Coldwater Canyon, and then had to merge back into the left when he realized that people were making a right onto Coldwater in front of him.  Like, this guy has a really nice car, definitely nicer than mine, and was obviously confused as to why I didn’t speed and do what he wanted me to do, unlike every soul he’s crushed on his way to buying his Lexus.  The fact that he saw fit to honk at me and then muscle in front of me lets me know how unreasonable I was by having the audacity to not let the owner of the road drive like the idiot he is.

To top the morning off, as I was stopped at a four-way stop sign on my residential street, this red BMW driving up to the sign to my right approached, seemed like he was slowing a bit, but gunned it anyway, completely NOT stopping and making me hit the brakes in the intersection.  I honked and this old man turned his head to look at me for a second, completely expressionless.  I’m sure he didn’t even realize he had a stop sign.  Sigh.

I live in the valley and things like this happen everyday.  Every. Day.”

I live in the Valley now and can also vouch for this.  Hell, just the other day, an old clueless lady (in a dark green Honda or Toyota, can’t remember) just rolled right through a stop sign without even touching her brake.  She was coming from my right and could’ve hit any car moving forward that had just stopped for the 4-way stop sign intersection on the road perpendicular to her.  Thankfully, she missed me, though I did honk at her in protest–and like the driver of this BMW, I simply saw a clueless, vacant stare.

Filed under: aggressive, clueless, observation, senior, speeding, tailgating