L.A. Can't Drive

Idiocy Meter

Asshole Meter

I don’t know about you, but today was particularly full of asshole encounters.  It’s a Friday…shouldn’t people be happy or at least more relaxed?  For some reason, I kept running into one selfish prick after another.  This afternoon, I had two people running stop stops to avoid proper driving protocol–one to my left, refusing to yield the right-of-way when we reached the intersection at the same time; one to my right who thought stopping behind the car in front of her satisfied her obligation to stop at a stop sign.  This all happened within a one block radius in Brentwood, by the way.

After a slew of encounters like the ones above, I finally cracked at the end of the day when these aggressive, selfish, impatient assnuts in Glendale (which is becoming less and less endearing by the month) didn’t want to wait to make their left turns at a busy intersection anymore and started: 1) cutting off pedestrians still in the crosswalk, 2) turning in front of right-turning cars (which had the right-of-way) that were patiently waiting for the pedestrians to clear the crosswalk, and 3) turning in front of cars going straight that clearly had the right-of-way.  I started flashing my lights vigorously at this one slow-left-turning stubborn Valley punk as I continued straight through the intersection and had to break to a full stop to avoid hitting this pig sh*tlet.  Now get this: after this guy finished his left turn (with his whorish-looking girlfriend in the passenger seat), the SUV behind him proceeded to follow him as I started to accelerate to continue straight ahead.  Back-to-back fu*ktards…exactly what I needed to cap a splendid day of assholish driving encounters.  I leaned on my horn and glared at this vagoid.  I mean, seriously, did he think I was flashing my lights to attract females of his lower evolved species?  Are so many people in this town really so brazen as to throw all aspects of driving law, courtesy, and safety out the window when it suits them?  Or are so many people really this stupid?  I don’t get it….I just don’t get how so many people can be either this absentminded or so flagrantly bullheaded.

And I haven’t even gotten to the above photo!  We were traveling on the 134 East in very light traffic, going a good 80 MPH in the #1 lane (next to the carpool lane), traveling at a safe distance behind the car in front of us.  This jackass in a white Volkswagen Jetta starts riding our ass for a good couple of miles to get us to move faster.  Given the fact that we were already moving faster than all the other lanes on the freeway and had another car in front of us, we stayed where we were.  Granted, I should’ve practiced what I preach and did a little defensive driving by moving temporarily over to my right.  But after today’s numerous stereotypical L.A.  asstwat interactions, I kept on driving until I saw him move over to his right, pass, and then cut back in front (without signaling, of course), at which time he proceeded to tailgate the car that was in front of us.  A hobby of his, perhaps?  Try coin collecting, or maybe something else more benign.  Oy vey, too bad I wasn’t at a computer sooner to vent about the stubborn, arrogant, posthumous-MJ-bandwagoning, Angelyne-chasing, sunglasses-indoors-wearing morons in this town.  And…scene…..

Filed under: aggressive, car lights, clueless, observation, speeding, tailgating