L.A. Can't Drive

Idiocy Meter

Asshole Meter

This lady needs a serious reality check…talk about being lost in the clouds.  Although this picture was taken on Highland near the 101 Fwy on-ramp, a litany of drivers had to endure her asinine driving for a good mile before this photo was taken.  Where do I begin?  I first encountered this Toyota SUV as I approached Hollywood going north on Highland.  Not only was she traveling significantly slower than traffic in the 2 other northbound lanes, but there was no one else in front of her (at least not for the several blocks proceeding this photo).  OK, people, unless you’re about to make a left turn, move over to slower lanes of traffic to your right.  Traffic wasn’t heavy at all; she could’ve moved over if she had the slightest bit of awareness of her surroundings.  Every car you see in front of her in this photo actually had to pass her on her right–no exaggeration.  Why didn’t I, you ask?  I suppose I took one for the team for the sake of this blog.  I immediately regretted my choice, though, as we approached the intersection at Franklin and Highland.  This lady entered the intersection (with me behind her) about half a second after the traffic lights turned yellow.  All of a sudden, she started to slow down for no apparent reason, especially since she was already traveling at the speed of molasses.  In fact, she was traveling so slowly that we were both still in the middle of the intersection (it’s a big intersection) when the traffic lights turned red.  What did this moron do?  She stopped to a dead halt in the middle of the intersection.  I sh*t you not, in this multi-signaled intersection that has at least 4 different traffic light sequences, asswipe decided to block all lanes of traffic.  WTF?  I leaned on my horn–and I mean leaned–to get this driver’s ass moving.  Finally, she realized that she wasn’t behind a limit line, was in the middle of the intersection, was holding up traffic, and should never have stopped in the first place.  And the reason why I know the driver was a “she” was that I eventually passed her as she changed lanes to her right (about damn time), and I saw a lady in her 50′s with a poor excuse for a redhead dye job and way too much plastic surgery on her face (think one of the ending scenes in Raiders of the Lost Ark).  Her face was stretched so tight, she had the Batman’s Joker grin.  And here’s where my NY pride comes in–dingbat had a vanity plate that clearly states that she has roots in ‘Boston’.  A vanity plated car, an Angeleno who can’t drive, and a likely Red Sox fan to boot.  It’s like I was born not to like this person.

Filed under: clueless, observation