Old, Angry, and Ugly
Idiocy Meter
Asshole Meter
Boy, is this not a good week for senior citizens. This crotchety old bugger in a Mercedes was impatiently weaving and tailgating all along Burton Way and nearly collided into a red Toyota in the process. It’s a good thing for him he didn’t, because that Toyota was a beat up piece of junk, and you can bet that the driver would have tried to milk every cent out of any automobile liability claim. Though I took this photo at Doheny, he ended up behind me a few blocks down the road (more proof that driving like a senile dick with an overinflated prostate does nothing for your commute). I took a gander at my rearview mirror and and saw a slouching, scruffy-looking, ornery old man with glasses and an unsightly overbite. He also apparently falls under the category of L.A. drivers that only signal for turns as opposed to lane changes, given that he signaled as he turned off of Little Santa Monica but not during the dozen or so erratic lane changes he committed earlier. An uncoordinated, slow-reflexed road rager like this guy should not be allowed to drive–ever. Why isn’t his asshole meter higher, you ask? At least he wasn’t speeding.
Filed under: aggressive, car lights, senior, tailgating
there are 3 types of old people, in my analysis.
(1) the bitter old people who are angry at the world because they’re old and therefore drive like assholes
(2) the senile old people whose brains have shriveled up into little pieces of dried spinach to the point where they’re borderline retarded. i once watched a little old lady (driving one of those massive old lincolns) back out of her parking spot and keep going backwards (accelerating the whole time) until she slammed her rear into the parked car that was directly behind her …
(3) the senile asshole old people who are both angry at the world and borderline retarded – these are the ones who are capable of doing the most damage
at a certain age, driving tests should be mandatory every year. question is, what is that age?
i say, 60.
Frankly, I don’t care if you’re 19 or 90 if you can prove that you are a safe and law-abiding driver. My proposal is to have driving tests randomly issued to drivers residing or working in Los Angeles, and any driver is eligible for selection every 4 to 6 years. This will be added on top of the written tests (that really are a joke) that are already randomly issued whenever one renews his/her license. Though I agree that a higher percentage of drivers of say, senior citizens or teenagers, tend to be worse drivers, the law would never get passed if it even hints at profiling a particular demographic. In this case, AARP would block it in a second.
That’s a good point. Plus as your site clearly demonstrates, there’s assholes and idiots in all age groups. I’m worried, however, that there’s a chance some jerk could go his whole life without ever getting selected for a random test. Here’s another idea … You have to take a driving test every time you renew your license. The only problem is you’d have to expand the DMV, which is already too big in my opinion.
Judd, I’ve thought about the problem of expanding the DMV as well, but there could be a branch that just focuses on testing and then reports test results to the DMV. The Los Angeles economy suffers tens of millions each year due to SIG alerts and other accidents due to poor or reckless driving. The amount of money saved by a reduction of these accidents can theoretically offset any costs for such a testing program.