L.A. Can't Drive

Idiocy Meter

Asshole Meter

So in yesterday’s post, I mentioned how I was en route to pick up some friends at LAX who were flying in from New York.  Well, here’s a photo of a Mazda CX-7 SUV on La Cienega that just added to yesterday’s rainy, cloudy mess.  When I pulled up to the vehicle at a red light and looked over, I saw an absentminded driver and his spaced-out wife.  It was around 8:15 p.m. when I took this photo, and you can clearly see that every other car in the immediate vicinity had its headlights on.  Here’s the kicker: At no great expense on my part, I first tried casually flashing my lights briefly from behind to give them a clue.  Nothing happened.  I then found myself again next to them at another red light and made eye contact with both the driver and the passenger before pointing to the front of their car and mouthing “headlights”.  They just stared at me blankly, looked at each other slightly confused, and then resumed their vacant stares ahead.  Clearly they didn’t speak English, but how about basic sign language?  Maybe next time I need to dumb myself down to a pre-Homo sapien level of intelligence and get out of the car, aggressively point and grunt, and then unzip my pants and pee on their headlight.  Who knows?  I might actually make some friends, and then we can gesture wildly together over the wonders of fire.

Filed under: car lights, clueless, observation, rain