L.A. Can't Drive

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Idiocy Meter

Asshole Meter

Boy, was L.A. overrun with self-entitled jackasses this weekend!   This only supports my theory that drivers become worse in this town as the weather gets hotter.  Forget about the fact that L.A. can’t drive in the rain–L.A. can’t drive in a heatwave!  I mean, honestly, what do I talk about first?  The multiple instances of people running red lights?  Scooching for about 500 feet into opposing traffic before reaching the left turn only lane?  People running stop signs?  Near hits with pedestrians?  In the end, I thought it would be best to talk about the city’s mad rush to the beaches this weekend.  The average traffic congestion is bad enough in L.A., but compound that with the need to find parking near the beach, and all hell breaks loose.  Unfortunately, we had to attend a birthday party for a very good friend of ours about 2 blocks away from Venice Beach.  The fact that she is such a good friend was the only reason why we drove around for 45 minutes looking for parking.  Given that the summer weather has only just begun, may I bring to your attention a small one-way alley just off of Washington near Pacific that seems to have a gift for sh*tting out assholes going the wrong way at an alarming rate?  Exhibit A is an impatient punk in a black Range Rover that felt the need to shortcut his way to the beach parking lot by darting down the wrong way of a one way alley.  He then had the gall to start giving us attitude when he thought we weren’t going to let him cut in front.  Hmm, if he were actually driving legally, he wouldn’t have appeared there in the first place.  No chicken or the egg issue here…..jackass in a Range Rover, maybe, but that’s about it.

No sooner than 15 minutes later, while we were circling the same roads looking for empty parking spaces, these snot wads in a Jeep peel out of the same exact one way alley at top speed and nearly T-bone our car.  They lurched violently forward as they braked while we veered to the left as far as we could to avoid the collision.  Though they were apologetic and slightly embarrassed, that doesn’t explain why the hell they were speeding the wrong way down a one way alley while making a blind right turn at top speed instead of yielding the right of way to through traffic.

Seriously, people, who the flying fu*k drives like this???

Self-entitled, impatient, single-minded assholes looking for a faster way to get skin cancer.

Filed under: aggressive, clueless, observation, speeding